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The pain that doesnt go away.

I don’t know what hurts more. Falling in love or physical pain. Physical pain is something fast. Like falling down and scraping you knee, there’s that little sting of pain. The pain goes away. Falling in love is like setting yourself for failure. You tell yourself no. Everything they say is like all the others. But you start to fall. Almost in a trance, and you start caring and noticing every little thing. Before you know it you think of them all the time and their interests and loves and dislikes become yours and you feel so high up in this shitty world. You know everything about them and they know everything about you. They claim to love you for everything. Even your flaws. They’re with you almost everyday and you get so used to the feeling. They promise they will never leave.. In reality they will. Then things start to change and at this age it changes fast and before you know it you have to face that it’s over. They move forward without you. They don’t come over anymore. They rarely text or call. You give eachother nice head nods or have short little pointless conversations. You come home alone and try to remember every memory or everything they said. You sit there at night wondering what you could have done. It’s a pain that doesn’t go away. You go through the hate stage where you try to hate them and say you’re totally over it but who are you fooling? You face the truth. Theres a person who knows everything about you and you could always go to and they just up and disappeared  You’re always going to care. They are always going to matter. You need to let go but you just don’t know how yet. You’re stuck in middle of giving up and moving forward or looking back and keep trying. You’re in that stage where the pain is yet to go away. </3

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